Confidence Within, or Confidence Without...

This week, I saw an article shared by a few of my friends.  The implication was that wearing makeup is not the key to confidence, as confidence comes from the inside.   You can read the article here.  "Things you learn when you don't wear make-up for a week" raises some valid points.  And on the whole, I agree with the sentiment.

There is a BUT, as you'd expect, otherwise there's no point to my blog.
While I encourage everyone who talks to me about confidence to build the skills and behaviours on the inside that will them more confident, I'm more than happy to suggest props and external elements which give a confidence boost.

If you're struggling with self-belief, taking away your make-up might not be the best way to get that back.

Here are my "instant"  external confidence boosters for women, or men:

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1. Get a haircut.  Whether it's a full re-style, a tint on your graying roots, or simply the feeling that you're treating yourself, when your hair looks good, man or woman, it's easier to feel better.  I'm a very confident person, as you'd expect, but you won't find too many photos of me on bad hair days!  And if it's needed, pluck those unruly stray eyebrow/nostril/chin/ear hairs.  Feeling groomed is a great way to feel more together.
2. Do your nails.  Men, I don't mean start applying coloured polish (unless that's your thing).  But do ensure that your nails are neatly trimmed, filed to smooth edges, and, if there are a lot of ridges, buffed.  You can do this yourself within a minute or two.  It's hard to feel like a together adult when your hands look like you just quit playing with mud-pies.
3. Check your smile.  See your dentist.  I'm not talking here about spending thousands on cosmetic dentistry.  Trust me, the only one worrying about your gap tooth or crooked smile is you.  But brush your teeth after eating to avoid "the spinach factor", keep your breath fresh, and ensure you keep things under control by regular dental check-ups.  You'll feel better for it and nothing says confidence like a wide open-mouthed smile.
4. Take a yoga/pilates/tai-chi/qi-gong class. Whatever approach you take, you'll spend an hour or so taking time for yourself.  That's an immediate signal to you and those around you that you are worth looking after.  And spending an hour or so each week concentrating on great posture, breathing, and strengthening your body will have long term benefits for your well-being.
5. Check your wardrobe.  Again, this is not about spending a ton of money on clothes.  This is about simple maintenance. Replace missing buttons, polish your shoes, remove food stains, throw away laddered stockings (and always carry a spare pair).  If you've got a wardrobe full of clothes that taunt you with your weight gain, get rid of them.  You are the best you that you're ever going to be right in this moment, whatever your size.  You don't need to look like a fashion model, but ensuring whatever you're wearing is clean, fresh, well maintained and not ragged around the edges helps you present your best self to the world at large.

Confidence really does come from within.  But if there's something you can do to "quick fix" your confidence on the outside, why not do that?  
If you still want more help or coaching to boost your confidence at work, or in your private or social relationships, I'm available for one to coaching by phone, or in person.  I have a few slots left before Christmas, so book now to start 2015 as the you that you want and deserve to be.